Thank you for helping my neighbors with their mortgage payments. I bet if they had known you were going to pay their mortgage, they would have bought a bigger house! You know who they are: those neighbors down the street who, in the "good times", purchased their house with no money down, refinanced it several times, then bought SUVs, ATVs, RVs, a pool, a big screen plasma television, two Wave Runners, a boat, and a Harley. I was wondering....since I'm paying my mortgage AND theirs, could you arrange for me to borrow the boat now and then?
A concerned citizen
P.S. These neighbors also need help with their credit cards. When do you want me to start making those payments?
P.P.S. I almost forgot--they didn't file their income tax return this year either. Should I go ahead and file for them or will you be appointing them to cabinet posts?